Tipping the Scales
This morning when I weighed myself, I got an awful fright…
For the weight that came up on the dial was certainly not right.
I’ve really had it with these scales, they’re utterly misleading,
I slid them over to the bath to get a second reading.
Again the weight that registered was ridiculously high,
I moved them back towards the loo to have another try.
The pointer stubbornly remained just under ten stone three…
I raised one foot and then breathed in, but all quite fruitlessly.
My last hope was the carpet, so I moved to softer ground,
Just to suffer more frustration I’d gained another pound.
I’ll really have to face the fact these scales have had their day.
They simply can’t deliver me an honest, spot-on weigh.
A brand new, high-tech digital would really be the bizz,
I need top-notch equipment now that tells it like it is.
And passing by the mirror, I catch sight of my reflection,
It’s not a picture that inspires, a more in-depth inspection,
But I am not at all perturbed by the vision that appears,
That mirror distorts everything, it’s been like that for years