Friends

11 June 2017

FORGETFULNESS - OR SOMETHING!

Recently I had a visit from a guy I have known for a while but didn’t see often rarely saw. In fact, I’ve probably only seen him three times in three years!
It was Alex. Alex from a now ceased trading carpet-shop, Alex who laid the wooden flooring in the hall, Alex who laid the wooden flooring in the new shower-room. Yes, it was Alex, who I couldn’t remember. How embarrassing is that? He took it all in good part, well he could hardly do anything else, could he?

Can you imagine how awful I felt? Embarrassed isn’t adequate enough. I really wanted the earth to open and swallow me wholesale. Even his good looks didn’t help. I mean, how could I forget a handsome, good looking man with an excellent physique, nice manners and friendly,

He obviously guessed my predicament because he went on to say that he had
done some jobs for me… including fixing the central heating timer. That last should have been enough to remind me since we had such a laugh over it.

Under the pretext of closing a door to stop Charlie getting out (I don’t allow him near passing traffic) I moved away and tried to get the brain in working order. Eventually I went back to where he stood, outside, and somehow felt brave enough to confess that I didn’t remember him. Then, as I spoke, it all came back. OF COURSE, I remembered him. He was the guy who helped me when I had that fall, made me a cup of tea, and settled me down while he proceeded to do the job he came to do.

I couldn’t apologise enough and he took it in good part, or seemed to, goodness only knows what he actually thought.

The daft thing is that he had been on my mind because I needed someone to do some work for me, yet when he appears unexpectedly at my door I don’t know him. Saints preserve me and everyone else who suffers with severe forgetfulness.  That’s my worst experience so far, please God don’t let there be more!

Alex is going to fit a carpet for me, that’s if he turns up. In his shoes I would want to keep well away from someone who seems to be rather mad.



34 comments:

S. J. Qualls said...

Ha Ha Ha. Isn't getting old(er) just the absolute most fun?
Did he give you the "Bless her heart" look?
Maybe when he comes to the door again, he'll let you know who he is and why he's there right away.
I have never really had much of a gift for remembering faces ... so don't feel lonely!

Valerie said...

SJQ, thanks for making me feel better. I almost hope he doesn't call again, even though he's supposed to be bringing carpet samples for me to see. I have a huge suspicion he won't come but I hope I'm wrong.

Ron said...

OMG Valerie, for the past several years (actually, the past MANY years) I've been having the same experience - I am soooooooooo forgetful of people's names. When I first starting my current job over 2 years ago, I had the worst time remembering everyone's names because we have a very large crew at work and we often get new hires. UGH!

Have you ever spotted someone in the mall/street/or store walking towards you and you know that you know them, yet you can't remember their name? That has happened to me a lot.

I think everyone in the world should be required to wear a first name tag on their shirt/blouse. That would solve the problem, right? HA!

Hope you're enjoying a lovely Sunday, my friend!
X

P.S. I love the picture of Charlie on your phone. He is so cute!

Valerie said...

Oooh, Ron, I seldom remember names. Like you this has gone on for years but so long as I recognise a face I can bluff my way through. This time I didn't even recognise the face. I agree we should all wear name tags. It must be difficult for you if you are faced with newcomers as well as the everyday staff. If I were you I would have to carry a notebook around with me. Imagine what it would look like if you whipped out a notebook every time you met someone new. Heehee you could invent all sorts of tales as an excuse.

I guessed you would like the photo of Charlie. Being on the phone makes him view-able at all times. Sunday has been spent in front of the television watching the French Open. Kept me out of mischief, so to speak. Enjoy the coming week, my friend. The weeks come round far too quickly, don't you think x

joeh said...

I'm with Ron, i usually know someone is a person I should know, but can not come up with a name...been that way forever. You get good at saying, "Hey Dude, how's it going?" nd "Whoa, been a while, how ya' doin?" While hoping the name will come.

Denise inVA said...

No, I think Alex is a good guy, he'll be back. After spending the best part of the morning looking for a box of checks, I can truly empathise with you. The problem with me is that I get into these tidy-up frenzies and can't find a blessed thing afterwards. As for people, it wasn't that long ago that I met someone at a social gathering who talked to me like she had known me all her life. It took ten minutes of talking before the penny dropped and I remembered her, but I couldn't bring myself to say, sorry I don't know who you are, silly me! It would have saved me a lot of angst in those ten minutes. At least you said right from the very beginning and I am proud of you.

p.s. I have started taking cell phone shots of things to remember where I put them, and am organizing a file, both in a little brown book because I haven't given up on that yet ;) and on my computer in a 'WHERE DID I PUT THAT' file, lol. Hang in there, we're all in the same boat, using the same paddle, rowing up the same river.

Valerie said...

Joeh, this is great, I am so pleased I shared this incident with all my blogging friends. Oh the times I have 'played it cool' when meeting someone I actually knew but didn't recognise. It is such a relief to know that others go through similar situations. I don't think I'll ever feel bad again.

Valerie said...

Denise, I love you! Your response was so good it had me chuckling at the similarity between us, I had no idea others experienced the same things. After reading your reply I started to giggle and haven't stopped yet. It was the bit about organising a file that got me giggling.
Had to switch on the computer to reply IMMEDIATELY. Laptops might be good but they're slower. Another thing, as a just in case, I have printed off your reply (in case I forgot) and am now going to start taking pictures on the cell phone. Thanks for that tip, I get so tired writing lists! Oooh Denise, you have made me feel better. Hee hee, see you you up the river!

Carole said...

Valerie you are way to hard on yourself! I like to think of it as prioritizing what is important. The other way to look at it: the brain needs a little extra time as we get older to get to the right "file drawer" in our brain. It may take a little bit, but it's there. When I can't quite remember something I like to say "it's on the tip of my brain". :-)

Jimmy said...

Valerie I have done the exact same thing, I know that you say you don't expect Alex to come back, but hopefully he does as it appears that you like him and he does good work.

Denise had a good idea, take a picture of Alex to keep for future reference.

Dan the Mountain Man said...

Valerie, I have a hard time remember people's names too. It seems to get worse the more busy I am or at least in the middle of doing something.

Valerie said...

Hi Carole, I like that expression about the tip of the brain... I must change my style of thinking! I think of was the surprise of the incident that got to me but it taught me a valuable lesson.

Valerie said...

Hi Jimmy, I hope you are right. I have a'ready adopted one of Denise's ideas, I never knew the phone would THAT useful.

Valerie said...

Dan, it's almost reassuring to know that others have similar problems.

kden said...

He will show up, and when he does just call him Allen to break the ice :) I'm not good with names either, especially when taken by surprise. My standard line is "Hi.......there." Of course I remember their name when they are long gone.

Jenny Woolf said...

I never had much of a memory for faces or names, so I've been doing that kind of thing for most of my life, but today for fully five minutes I forgot what the name of a flash key was. I knew what it did, just not what it was called! Now that IS annoying!
I am sure Alex forgave you without a second thought.

troutbirder said...

Retired teachers are used to this and become quite skillful in dealing with recognition problem. Image have had thousands of students over four or more decades particularly when they were youngster. Now dealing with my spouses dementia puts a whole new focus on memory issues so we work on it together...:)

Geraldine Helen Hartman said...

It's not unusual to forget someone's name Val, it is not like you'd seen this guy on a regular basis. I'm quite good with names but sometimes I have to think for a bit when it's someone I haven't had much contact with. Don't feel too bad about this. I know people a lot younger than you who can't remember phone numbers!!

Geraldine Helen Hartman said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Valerie said...

kden, I hope you are right, I need a carpet replacing!! I've gone through a few 'Hi there' situations and the name always came back to me.... of course, I'm talking 'once upon a time'.

Valerie said...

Jenny, i will, of course, let people know if Alex turns up! Erm... what IS a flash key?

Valerie said...

TB, it's good that you and your wife are working through it together. Hope she manages to get through life without too many problems.
I'm hoping my forgetfulness is not a more serious problem.

Valerie said...

Geraldine, I didn't even recognise the face - now that WAS a surprise to me. I've heard the expression 'putting a name to the face' but I didn't even know the face to start with!

Geraldine Helen Hartman said...

PS The Charlie pics are soooo cute.🐱 Mr. Cheddar approves too.😊

Eddie Bluelights said...

Hi Valerie, I was so pleased you called by and glad also I popped round to read this highly amusing story . . . haha.
Things like this happen a lot and I for one am very good at remembering faces but very poor at remembering names . . . often they have to help me out . . lol

I am sure Alex saw the funny side and was not offended . . . :)
very nice to see you again . . :)

Valerie said...

Hello Eddie. Silly differences of so long ago didn't stop me popping into your blog when I saw your name (somewhere). I only post about once a week now but I check in every day to see and read other blogs. I will definitely go back again to read yours.

I hope you're right about Alex, after all he is supposed to be fitting a carpet for me. I lost my husband almost two years ago so blogging has given me something to read, write and look forward to.

Eddie Bluelights said...

Thanks Valerie, very sorry about your husband. I lost my darling Maria four years ago ~ we were married for 40 years.

Yes, pity we had that difference but hope that is all behind us now. I'll be a regular caller if I may. I like coffee made with milk and no sugar please.

I did a couple of poems when I lost Maria which helped me enormously to release my emotions. They are on the blog ~ one is called Reflections . . .

A Cuban In London said...

Great story. I am sure Alex didn't mind and that he will return to fit your carpet. :-)

Greetings from London.

Valerie said...

Thanks, Cuban. Fingers crossed he does come back.

Mr. Shife said...

I think you are in good hands with Alex, and he will certainly be back because you are still awesome even if you have a small memory lapse. Take care, Val.

Beatrice P. Boyd said...

it happens to most of us from time to time, so I would be worried and sure Alex will return. This time you will be sure to remember his name too!

Susan Kane said...

Sounds like this could be a friendship for you both. Can you smash anything that needs to be fixed afterwards?

Valerie said...

Susan, thanks for the giggle. I have put a PS on today's post to say that Alex DID come back. New carpet on the way!

Valerie said...

Beatrice, he did come back and yes I did remember his name.