28 May 2012

Monday Mirth

A policeman stops a woman driver and asks for her licence. He reads it and says, 'Lady, it says here that you should be wearing glasses.'
The woman answers, 'I have contacts.'
'I don't care who you know,' says the policeman, 'you're getting a ticket.'


Did you hear about the 83 year old woman on her way to church who talked herself out of a speeding ticket? She told the policeman that she had to get there before she forgot where she was going.


  1. can we continue? shut was pretty funny...and the lady that might forget her way..smiles...too funny...

  2. Great video share, Valerie!

    And those two jokes are HILARIOUS!

    'I have contacts.'

    'I don't care who you know,' says the policeman, 'you're getting a ticket.'


    And that second one sounds like me because I forget why I even walked into a room!

    Thanks for the hearty Monday morning laughs! Enjoy your day!


  3. Love Morecambe and Wise and the jokes you shared. :)

  4. "I have contacts"! Too funny!

  5. Glad you found it amusing, Brian.

    Hey Ron,I think I'll remember that line about the contacts... it might come in useful one day.

    Thanks, Pearl. It's good to have a giggle now and again.

  6. Very funny, I often forget where I am going.

  7. Very good Valerie. You sure you can't make my open mic party? You could tell a few jokes.

  8. I never forget where I'm going--mostly cuz I don't remember that I forgot.....*sigh*

    But the laughs are greatly appreciated, tyvm!

  9. ...okay, I laughed at him nearly losing his wig, but then he stepped out in a skirt and I lost it! :-) Heh...

  10. The jokes are awesome and the video is terrific! Thanks for sharing Val :)


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